Hiraeth: Homesick for a place you've never been

Or even a person you've never met.

Hiraeth (Welsh)

Have you ever felt a connection with a person you’ve never met? Or a place you’ve never been?

In my office, there’s a bookshelf where I keep a framed black-and-white photograph of my family. In the photo, my grandmother and grandfather, mother, and aunts are all gathered around the central figure: my great-grandmother. She’s wearing thick, dark glasses and a hardened smile. I never had the chance to meet her, but my mother has told me stories about her strength and tenacity. And when I look at that photo, I feel a strange sense of familiarity and belonging, almost like I knew her. Almost like the day the picture was taken, I was there, even though that's impossible. I miss her, yet I’ve never met her. How is that possible?

The Welsh word Hiraeth describes this feeling. It means a nostalgic longing for home, but it’s a little more elusive than that. It’s also a longing for a time, place, or person that feels like home but may no longer exist or that never existed at all. One source describes hiraeth as “a blend of homesickness, nostalgia and longing.” It’s a “distinct feeling of missing something irretrievably lost.” Another source says it’s “a longing to be where your spirit lives.” When I think about my great-grandmother, I feel hiraeth. When I look at that photo or listen to my mother describe her, it’s like hearing about an old friend that I’ll never get a chance to meet.

The Welsh people have a strong connection to their land, heritage, and language, journalist James Griffiths told me in a reported essay about endangered languages. Hiraeth seems to reflect a deep attachment to that heritage. The word reminds us that despite the impermanence of life — change and loss are inevitable  — we also have a deep connection to the people and places that came before us.

From the archives

Cantonese Cooking Helped Me Fall Back in Love with Who I Am (the Kitchn, 2021): “Cooking can be a way to connect with a part of yourself that you’ve forgotten.”

What’s new?

• I wrote a personal essay for Electric Literature about how to be creative when your ancestors are watching.

• My friend Marina (hi, Marina!) shared this powerful episode of the podcast Noble Champions. The episode explores how racial trauma is transmitted from generation to generation.  

• A former writing student sent me a fascinating piece he wrote for the South China Morning Post about stolen Cambodian artifacts. 

 — Kristin